Wednesday, 15 April 2009

Just grit the teeth

We are what we believe we are.
C. S. Lewis 


If I have ever mastered anything in my little life then it will be doing "the impossible things"...no, not anything of any specific monumental value ;) However, over and over again I have heard from people that what I wanted to do was impossible. The reasons varied depending on what I came up with at the time. From wanting to have my own horse while there was no way my family could have afforded it to going freelance in a foreign country (while having no clue how what when and what for) I've never seemed to have tackled any simple tasks. Apart from my mum who I think is the only person in the whole world who truly thinks I can do anything as long as I want it badly enough I know people always thought I am over ambitious, or a dreamer, or just plain crazy. And yet, over and over again I proved them wrong. 
The current time is the most testing though...I just hope that fighter in me will wake up soon as I am fed up with this I-can't-do-anything me. There are moments I feel my old powerful self is coming back but they are too rare to be of any help. 
One thing downed on me today - there is absolutely no way I am giving up now. On the way back home I was staring at the world outside the train window, passing so fast and furious...don't want anything to pass me by only because I haven't tried hard enough. 
So I will grit my teeth and keep going. 

It was a nice day. Very busy morning followed by lunch with my friend. Seeing her so happy recharges my used up batteries, always seems to. For me she's one of those people who you would chose to spend time with when you feel like being by yourself. And to top it all my chargrilled chicken was splendid!

Afternoon saw me giving two lunge lessons to a lovely couple and taking my regular little people XC. They had lots of fun, only one rider 'dismounted without my permission' but jumped straight back on. 
I then sat watching J. jumping and chatted to C. while waiting for a girl I work with to finish turning horses out as she was going to show me around the place she lives in (I'm trying to get to know the surrounding areas, see as many places as possible so some move decision can finally be made).
I also managed to talk to a colleague who runs a show-jumping yard as I am trying to organise for some jumping lessons for myself so fingers crossed it will work out.

Work done and off we went for a very very long walk, my feet are falling apart - let me tell you, riding boots are NOT GOOD for hiking. 





If you're still with me have a look at this video, just watched it and thought there are some good bits and pieces of information in it (and the horse is super). Just click the link below:
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