Some time ago, in a chat with a friend I shared some partially hilarious, partially impossible life situations I had found myself in over the years.
- I don't know how you do it - she said - I wouldn't have the courage.
Surprise. How differently is the courage seen by different people.
The infinite confidence in the future - I envy that on some level. How could we slog away, endure something we dislike, maybe can't stand even, for this ethereal concept of "later".
As the life awakens around us and continues its inevitable, predictable cycle, so short at times, how could we store so much confidence in the days that aren't anywhere near? Is it the belief in some form of after life that makes people so relaxed about not having the life they want here and now? ;)
I watch people hating their jobs, being sick from stress, hating where they live, depressed, studying towards a degree they never want to pursue, staying with partners they can't stand and I wonder, maybe it's me who is the coward...I simply follow what makes me happy. I don't feel very courageous at all.
Spring brings many new phone calls with it. I can't help but wonder, where were you in the winter, people? :) The sun is still deceiving - you wake up to warm windows and go out to the cold wind that makes your eyes stream and fingers freeze.
It's very late tonight but I'd been writing and lost the feel for time. Must catch some sleep!